I've had a couple of calls from those lovely and caring people at Microsoft.
It's amazing how they know I've been having problems with my computer, and great that they can fix it over the phone.
First up was Kevin. He sounded more like a Deepak or Azif, but anyway, it was Kevin.
After I opened up some windows on my PC Kevin got excited, poor fellow, and went to get his manager John. John also sounded like he should be called Deepak or Azif, but anyway it was John. I spent some time congratulating him on his excellent English language skills and in particular his pronunciation, and wondered if he had attended Eton.
He declined to illuminate me on his education, so keen was he to fix my PC.
After I opened some more windows on my PC for John, he was very excited and asked me to read what it said on the screen.
At this point I claimed the screen questioned his sexuality, his mother's virtue, how many fathers he shared, indeed if had really been called Deepak I would possibly be branded as racist, but of course it was John, so that's OK. I also likened his intellect to that of a very dim witted slug, and suggested that a dog would have a higher social standing than him, his brothers, his sisters, his whole family.
He was trying to tell me he really would put a virus on my PC and that he would call every day, several times a day, but I was in mid-flow and not to be stopped. Eventually he hung up.
I've not had a nuisance call since.
Should I contact Microsoft and thank them for fixing my computer?